Love isn't blind, It's Sarcastic!
by LadyLoveless
Summary: When a new 'little' girl drops into the X crew's life, things get turned upsidedown! Suddenly Kurt has a new friend, Remy is constantly flirting with an insane pyress, and Logan's getting one nasty headache! KurtOC, RemyOC ON HOLD for re-editing
1. Chapter 1: Serenity

**_Love isn't blind. It's Sarcastic!_**

**By f0rSaKeNpRiNcEsS01**

**Edited by mentallyinsanepyress**

Howdy hey! You know, I haven't watched X-men evolution in about a year or two, and Pyress hasn't seen it at all,so try to forgiveus for misspelling names and getting information wrong. This'll be a Kurt/OC fic! Girls just can't resist the fuzzy blue elf! Huggles Kurt plushie Ahem.. I know that the X-men were exposed and now everyone knows that they're mutants, and that Tabby's part of the Brotherhood. In my fic, the X's haven't been expose, and Remy (Gambit) is part of their team now, and is living in the mansion. (And he gave up on Rouge. She was too stubborn and it got boring chasing after her when she constantly rejected him.) Remy also goes to their school and is 18, as are Jean and Scott. The rest of them are 17.

ON WITH THE SHOW!

**Chapter one; Serenity **

**Quote of the day- Time is a horse that runs in the heart, a horse**

**Without a rider on road at night.**

**The mind sits listening and hears it pass. **

**Wallace Stevens, _"The Pure Good of Theory"_**

Once upon a time, there was a very pale and fairly quite girl. She seemed normal for the most part, except she was awfully rude and sarcastic towards her class-mates... and other people in general. She could be nice; of course, she just thought it was a waste of time, just like the people around her were a waste of space. That's probably why she didn't have any friends; she would rather use most of her air for singing.

She was as innocent looking as could be, though. She had wavy, waist length, shimmering white hair; wide green eyes; a petite, almost 6th grader-ish, looking frame that was thin, but very curvy. Her voice was sweet as honey and smooth as silk, yet her tongue was an out of control fire that lashed out and burned almost anyone who dared bother her.

Her day had started out fairly normal; kids had avoided her and she already had a truck load of homework from her evil teachers who were in league with the brain eating llamas, even though it was only 4th period. The girl found herself praying for the day to speed up so she could get to her precious 7th period advanced choir. She sighed out of boredom as her math teacher droned on. She rested her elbows on her desk and hid her face in her hands, wondering if the old crone was actually the leader of the brain-eating llamas. Her eyes eventually drifted shut (after she tuned the hag out) and all she saw was the darkness of her eyelids.

That would change; all she had to do was wait.

Slowly images and colors danced before her. The most beautiful colors in the world and more! These bold and beautiful colors were accompanied by scenes of faeries of unparalleled beauty twirling and leaping gracefully in silken dresses of every color, as handsome sprites of pale and dark green skin danced among them.

A gentle smile graced her lips as she saw herself dancing among them in a form-fitting dress of untainted and shimmering white. She saw herself with large white angel wings intermingled with the deepest of crimson feathers.

She stood out in the crowd of pale faeries and green skinned sprites, but so did the being she was dancing with. It was a strange and almost frightening looking creature, with blue fur, pointed ears, white eyes, three fingered hands, a tail, and haunches. Just the same, she felt no malevolence from the being, only a sad and gentle spirit; one that had been shattered throughout it's life. Her light green eyes met it's pupil-less ones, and in them she saw; hidden deep, an unspeakable sadness so great that she couldn't help but weep for it.

She managed to tear her moist eyes away from it's white ones and survey the room, only to find that all the beautiful creatures were gone. She stared in wonder as the room dissolved into what looked like the front of a school. She looked back to the creature to discover warm hazel eyes staring into her green ones. The eyes were attached to a rather attractive brown haired teen with a huge goofy grin. She opened her mouth to ask what was going on, for these weren't her usual daydreams, but was jetted into the air at a rather alarming rate.

Luckily, she stopped her sickening ascent after a moment and stared with eyes glazed as the school scene changed to another. The grinning boy was sitting at a lunch table in an outside courtyard surrounded by a bunch of laughing teens. It was a relatively cloudy day and the girl could smell the electricity in the air. No one else was in the school courtyard aside from the six at the table she was currently staring at, one of which included the boy from before.

She watched as the grinning boy began talking to the small group at the table, before leaping onto the table and, in his excitement, knocked over a carton of milk onto a guy with bright red hair and sunglasses. The girl laughed wildly as the guy with sunglasses pulled the grinning boy off the table and into what looked likes a rather painful head lock.

She shoved a fist into her mouth to stifle her gut-wrenching laughter when she noticed the tall red haired girl look around frantically. The tall girl jumped up from her seat at the table and rushed over to the guy with sunglasses. She whispered something to him and he nodded, looking around suspiciously. The grinning boy, still in a headlock, said something too, then tried to worm out of the older boy's grip, failing as he did so.

As she watched the oddly muted scene, she finally began to hear their voices.

".It's weird, and I don't like this feeling. It feels like there's some one watching us, somewhere close by, but somewhere I can't quite sense them."

The, currently irritated, grinning boy perked up. "Ja, You veel it too Jeen? Zat feeling of veeing vatched? I felt like zat during class!" he questioned with a German accented voice.

The tall girl, Jean apparently, looked up suddenly, straight at their watcher. The girl let out a squeal of alarm as she felt gravity begin tugging at her small body. The people below her stared wide eyed. She watched them, searching desperately for some sign that she was still dreaming.

That is until she fell.

She screamed and plunged down about ten feet until she felt spindly arms wrap around her bridal style.

BAMPH!

She blinked. She was on the ground and there was a strange smell of sulfur in the air. She looked up and saw the hazel eyes staring into hers again, and somehow knew this wasn't a dream.

This was a little beyond her imagination.

**_Kurt's morning-_**

For Kurt his day was normal, if normal includes a girl phasing through your door because you shut your alarm clock off and your ride to school had just left.

Luckily for Kurt he had his teleportation ability. He had 'bamphed' himself into Scott's car when they were near the school, landing on his stomach across Rouge and Kitty's laps, causing its occupants, except Scott, to yell in surprise. That was completely normal, for them anyway.

Even from his belly-flop position across their laps, Kurt could easily see Kitty and Rogue glaring ferociously at him. He rolled onto his back and looked at Kitty, grinning impishly. "Oops?" Rogue leaned over towards Kitty and pushed Kurt's head off of her lap, causing his whole body to fall between the seats. She held him down and started to give him the world's most painful noogie!

Kurt yelped loudly, "I give, I give! Vorgive me Rogue! I did not mean to, it vas an accident! I was framed!" "Yea' right! Like ah'm supposed tah believe ya'll teleport onta us every mornin' "on accident"? I AIN'T BUYIN' IT SUGAH!" the Southern girl's voice rose in anger. Kurt just grinned, before remarking cheekily, "Vhat can I say? You make good pillows, ja?"

It was a good thing they pulled into the school parking lot.

Kurt leapt out of Scott's car and rushed off into the school, Rogue following close behind. He managed to loose the angry Goth in the massive crowd of teens and let out a long sigh of relief. He perked up immediately when he saw Tabitha 'Boom Boom' Smith, his current party crazy crush. He crept up behind her and snatched the delicious looking burger out of her hand, chomping into it hungrily.

"Hey! Ah' was eatin' that Fuzzy!" she mock glared at him. Kurt grinned again. "Ja, vwell now I'm eating it! As you say in America, 'Neener, neener, neener!'" He stuck out his tongue, showing Tabby part of her chewed up burger. The two walked to class, bickering and flirting playfully. (Most of the flirting on Kurt's part)

The day dragged on and Kurt just wished time would speed up, he wanted to go to lunch! _'Like time vould speed up… only vhen beautiful girls fall from ze sky.'_ He chuckled at his thought. _'Zat would be even better!_' a sly grin made it's way onto his face. He's only a boy, after all. After a while Kurt started to get a strange feeling. He felt creeped out, kind of like someone was watching him.

Soon; but not soon enough; the bell for lunch rang and Kurt rushed out of the class, leaving everyone else in the dust. He met up with Kitty, Evan, Rogue, Jean, and Scott after he bought his lunch then they all took a seat at their table in the courtyard. Kurt sucked up his food like a vacuum cleaner sucks up dirt. He finished _waaaaay_ before his friends did and decided to actually pay attention to their conversation.

"Hey, like, do you guys want to go to that new club, 'Alien,' something or other?" "That sounds interesting Kitty, but aren't you a little too young to get in there?" Scott asked, raising and eyebrow. Kitty rolled her eyes. "Like, duh, Scott! I have a couple of friends that work there! You, like, remember Robby? He's the bouncer! He said he'd let us in, totally free of charge with no questions asked!" Kurt's hazel hologram eyes lit up. "Keety you are awesome! Ve should go! I vould love to dance at a club, I'm a fuzzy leetle party moster!" He jumped onto the table to demonstrate.

He moved his feet, hips, and head to the nonexistent music in his head. He tried to pull off a dance move but instead kicked over Scott's carton of milk, spilling it all over his tan slacks. "Oops?" He smiled nervously at Scott, backing up slowly. Scott suddenly jumped up and grabbed him round the waist and yanked him off the table. He took his other arm and put Kurt in a head-lock, then removed his arm from around his waist and proceeded to give him the second most painful noogie the world had ever seen! Kurt laughed, then shouted for him to stop, and when Scott wouldn't, struggled to get out of Scott's vise-like grip.

No such luck there.

Angelic laughter fell from the sky and rung in Kurt's ears. He stopped struggling, standing still as a statue. Scott's head jerked up and Jean jumped from the table. She rushed over to Scott and Kurt and said in a hushed voice, "Something isn't right. I'm getting some strange vibes. It's weird, and I don't like the feeling. It feels like some one's watching us, somewhere close by, but somewhere I can't quite sense them." Kurt's head shot up to look at Jean's face. She looked worried.

He cocked his head to the side slightly, asking, "Ja? You veel it too, jeen? Zat feeling of veeing vatched? I felt like zat during class!" He was waiting for a reply when Jean swiveled her head quickly and looked up into the sky. He, Scott, Jean, Evan, Rogue and Kitty looked up as well and noticed something strange.

"Vell…You don't see zat every day, ja?" Kurt muttered to himself.

Floating about twenty feet above them was a petite, white haired, green eyed girl; dressed in a long, flowing white dress with bell sleeves about a foot longer than her arms, that glittered in the almost non-existent sunlight. (Kurt has amazing eyesight, ja?) The girl's laughter-moist eyes widened as she realized they were watching her. Kurt watched as she floated slowly down, then, instead of continuing to float gently down, began to plummet towards the ground at an alarming speed. The girl let out a cry of surprise and fell about ten feet before Kurt leapt into action, literally. He leapt slightly into the air and BAMPH was right next to her. He grabbed her bridal style (One arm under her knees and one arm under her neck, if you didn't know what 'bridal style' meant.) and bamphed back down to where Jean, Scott and Kitty were waiting.

She looked up at him in wide eyed amazement, her small powder white lips forming a shimmering 'o' shape. "**Wie geht es ihnen, fräulein**?" **((How are you, girl?))** he asked quietly. She nodded slowly then replied softly in a rich feminine voice, "**Es geht, vielen dank**!" **((Okay /So so, thanks a lot!))** Kurt blinked. His face broke into a wide grin. "You understood me! You speak German as well, ja!" Kurt exclaimed, reverting back to English in his excitement. She shook her head slightly. "Only little bits." She smiled apologetically.

"**Bitte**, could you put me down? Those freakishly tall people over there are staring." Her adorable little voice hardly came above a whisper now, as though the words were too fragile to say out loud. Kurt nodded mutely, feeling a blush rise, starting from his chest and making it's way up to his ears as her innocent green eyes looked into his. Of course the blush wouldn't be seen when he was in his true form, but he had on his holographic watch. (rolls eyes That's rather obvious, don't cha think?) He set the small white-haired girl down gently.

Scott leaned down and studied her. She was a petite girl, standing only about 5'1, and looked like a 6th grader compared to Scott's height of nearly 6'0. She looked small and fragile even when compared to Kurt and Kitty.

Scott finished studying the girl and leaned down towards her. "Who are you and why were you spying on us?" he interrogated. The girl jumped back about three feet from Scott and started to shake slightly. Scott repeated his question and still got no answer. He was about to start shouting until Jean put her hand on his shoulder. "You're scaring her Scott! Knock it off." She walked towards the girl slowly. The little girl shook even more, and eyed Jean warily, like she was going to pounce on her withought a second's warning. Jean gave her a warm smile and said gently, "It's alright, we aren't going to hurt you. We just want to know who you are."

The girl stared at her for a moment before answering, "My name is Serenity Bones. I don't know where I am or how the heck I got here." She stopped shaking and stared at Kurt, head cocked to the side innocently. **"Bitte, ****Können Sie mir helfen?****" **she asked, no emotion showing on her seemingly innocent face.

Well, there you have it! Sorry if things seem rushed or people seem out of character, I'm trying, I really, really am!

**Definitions**

"**Wie geht es ihnen…?"- **How are you?** "Fräulein"- 1) **Used as a courtesy title in a German-speaking area before the name of an unmarried woman or girl. **2) **Used as a form of polite address for a girl or young woman in a German-speaking area. **"Es geht, vielen dank**!"- "Okay (or so-so), thanks a lot!" **"Bitte"- **"please" **"Bitte, ****Können Sie mir helfen?****"- "**Please, can you help me?" **"Ja"-** I'm pretty sure that's German for 'Yes' or 'Yeah'. If not oh well. **  
**


	2. Chapter 2: BEWARE!

**_Love isn't blind. It's Sarcastic!_**

**By f0rSaKeNpRiNcEsS01 **

**And zukoslvr**

Alright! We're makin' good time on this! GO US! WH00T WH00T! And guess what peoples? We actually finished working on the 3rd chapter before we even started the second! Hahahaha! Weird huh? Alright lemme break this down fer yah! Remy is going to be 18 and has left the Brotherhood and is currently under Xavier's protection, so he's living at the mansion. Tabby is back at the mansion but not a lot of kids aren't talking to her because of what she did. (Ya know, leaving for the Brotherhood and all.) Umm…I think that's it….. All except for this little vent….

THE DAMM SUPERBOWL REFEREES CHEATED! THEY WERE PAID OFF! THE SEAHAWKS WON FAIR AND SQUARE YOU CRACK HEADS! RAWWWWWRRRRRRR!

Lol. Anyway….

ON WITH THE SHOW!

**Chapter two; **

**Quote of the day- There is no frigate like a book**

**To take us lands away,**

**Nor any courser like a page**

**Of prancing poetry.**

**This traverse may the poorest take**

**Withought oppress of toll;**

**How frugal is the chariot**

**That bears a human soul!**

**Emily Dickinson, _The Poems of Emily Dickenson_**

**_Recap-_ **_The girl stared at her for a moment before answering, "My name is Serenity Bones. I don't know where I am or how the heck I got here." She stopped shaking and stared at Kurt, head cocked to the side innocently. **"Bitte, **_**_Können Sie mir helfen?_**_**" **she asked, no emotion showing on her seemingly innocent face_

Kitty rushed over to the girl and knelt down to her level. She patted her back a little before saying in a soft voice, "There, there, you're, like, alright. Now, like, where'd you come from?" Serenity raised an eyebrow, her face turning a little red out of anger at being treated like a child by strangers. She lowered her head, trying to hide her angry blush, and answered methodically, "I'm from Spanaway." Kitty blinked. "Spana-what?" Serenity giggled slightly. "Span-uh-way, Washington." "Vwashington DC?" Kurt asked. Serenity just shook her head. "No, the state, Washington. Where am I?" Jean gave the girl a puzzled look. "Washington State? But that's all the way across the country! This is Bayville High, in Salem Center, New York."

Serenity's eyes widened. "T..This isn't….it can't be…I must still be dreaming.." She stuttered, looking so extremely lost that Scott felt dreadfully guilty for scaring her, even though he hadn't meant to. "Listen," Scott interrupted, "let's just take her to the mansion. Maybe the Professor can make some sense out of this. Besides, she might attract too much attention, her not being a student and all." Kurt started waving his arm around wildly. "Oo, oo, pick me! I'll take her!" and withought waiting for permission he rushed over to the confused girl and wrapped and arm around her waist. "Zis may feel strange, Fräulein, but don't worry. It's completely safe….unless I transport us inside a wall!" Both Kurt and Serenity disappeared with an extra loud 'BAMPH' not even a second after he finished his sentence(s).

They arrived at the mansion almost immediately, scaring Logan into dropping his beer. Upon hearing the bottle smash into the floor, Serenity let out a wraith like wail. Kurt let go of her waist and pressed his hands against his ears. She stopped, clamping a hand over her mouth, apologizing profusely. "I'm so sorry! I..I didn't mean….it just startled me! I just didn't expect that.." She felt the blood rushing to her face again so she slapped her hands over her face. Kurt just grinned. "Bitte, that was nozing compared to Harpie! She…" Logan cut him off. "Just who the hell is this, and why aren't you at school." Kurt grinned nervously. "Vwell you see Vwolverine.." "I'm sorry sir, it's my fault." Both guys' heads swiveled around to look at the snow-white teen. "I don't quite know what's going on, but he isn't to blame. He saved me actually." Logan raised an eyebrow. "Huh. Care to explain that one, Elf?" Kurt just sighed. "Vwe're going to zee ze Professor. Just come vwith us, ja?" he grabbed the little white-haired girl's hand and Logan's arm and proceeded to 'bamph' outside the Professor's office. He let go of them and raised his hand to knock.

"Come in Kurt, Logan, Serenity. I've been expecting you for quite some time now." Kurt shook his head slightly. "It still gives me ze creeps vwhen he does zat." He opened the heavy oak door and held it open for Serenity. After she had gone in; looking around in every direction for a sign of danger, Kurt went in, followed by a rather annoyed Wolverine.

**Serenity POV**

I walked into what looked like a large study, closely followed by the hazel-eyed boy and surly looking man, whose name I'm still not sure of. The boy had called him Wolverine, but this Professor character called him Logan. I'm so very confused. I mean, one moment I'm in my math class, the next I have this dream with that blue thing and the grinning hazel-eyed boy, and then I fall from the sky into a school in New York! Talk about a weird day…

I looked around the room warily; making sure nothing was going to randomly jump out and try to kill me, before noticing the man sitting behind a rather large oak desk. He gave me a small smile and motioned for the three of us to take a seat. We did, with me sitting as far away from that large surly man as possible. The boy seemed to notice this and gave me a wide grin. "No vworries, fräulein. He's really very nice….if you aren't on 'is bad side." I just rolled my eyes. "Well that's reassuring.."

The professor cleared his throat. "Now then, I would like to know what's going on." I immediately cracked up. "Well you sure as hell aren't the only one!" I grinned at the so-called Professor before letting my face go back to its emotionless state. The Professor shook his head and sighed. "Well, I suppose we'll figure it out eventually. Now I believe you would like to know where you are?" I blinked. How did he know I was thinking that? The older man smiled slightly. "This is Xavier's Institute for Higher Learning, and I am Professor Charles Xavier." I nodded slowly, still very confused about how this day was turning out. Prof. Xavier turned in his chair and….rolled out from behind his desk..? I studied him methodically, from his spotless blue suit, to the brown dress shoes on his disabled legs, I knew immediately that this man commanded respect.

I made no reply, just waiting for him to continue. "You're currently in New York, but where are you from?" If this guy thinks… "I know you don't want to tell me, but I would really appreciate it." I blinked. Alright…no harm, no foul right? "Spanaway, Washington. You know, that big half-desert, half-forest state across the country." Xavier chuckled slightly. "Yes, I know that state very well, although I've never heard of Spanaway." "It's a small city outside Tacoma." The surly man grunted. How the devil did he know that?

Xavier smiled again. "I see. Well I believe that calling your parents would be the best thing right now. Logan can give you a tour of the institute, while Kurt gets back to school." The grinning boy, now known to me as Kurt, pouted. "But professor!" "Kurt, go. I know for a fact that you have a math test today." "Awww… You should stop doing zat Professor, it's just not fair!"

"I can't give that little snowball a tour, I've got things to do," Logan growled. The Prof. raised an eyebrow, "I know for a fact that the only thing you have planned today is to drink me out of my mansion. Now, I suggest you start with the library, and Kurt, you get back to school." Logan growled again and Kurt sighed. "See you in an hour or two, fräulein," and without another thought disappeared. I was surprised to find myself missing him already. It's highly unusual for me to miss anything. Hell, so far I like it better here than back home! Though, I suppose no one will want to be around me once they figure out what I am….

Logan shoved his chair back, creating a nasty screeching sound, and stood up almost drunkenly. I stood up carefully and nodded my head at the Professor as parting, and walked silently after the surly ape-man, still known as Logan. (Haha!) I followed him toward the door at the left side of the Professor's office. He opened the door and we walked into what was possibly the most amazing library I had ever seen. All over the walls, piled on tables and a few on the floor, were the oddest assortment of books I'd ever seen. On one side of the room were comic books, right next to a large display of Shakespearian playbooks!

'_I've finally been killed by the rare brain-eating llamas and gone straight to the great library in the sky…' _I thought happily, letting out a contented sigh. Logan looked at me like I was some kind of disease that had come just to torture him. The way he glared… I had to duck my head to hide from those burning eyes… He let out a grunt and began to talk. "Alright Snowball, this is the library. It's self explanatory. Moving on…" I cut him off. "Listen, you don't want to give me a tour, I don't want you to give me a tour. Just leave me in here. Tell Kurt where I am when he gets back." _'Oh great, now he looks confused. Maybe I used too many words with over two letters?' _My mind scoffed sarcastically. Man, do I need to control those mean little voices in my head or what?

Logan coughed slightly, "Well, if your sure.." He was already edging towards the door. _'And here I thought he was suspicious of me.' _He stopped suddenly, whipping his head around. Personally, I think he may have given himself whiplash... He glared at me again and I lowered my head again. _'I hope I didn't say anything to offend him.' _

"How do I know you're not some kind of Brotherhood spy?" "A what-hood spy?" "Ferget it kid. Let's get this straight, Snowball, I don't trust you because you haven't earned it yet. You double-cross us and I'll have your head on mount in my room." I stared at him wide-eyed, like a deer in the headlights. I mean, he wasn't serious...Right? I nervously ran a hand over my watch. He sniffed, actually sniffed, me before speaking again. "I'll leave you in here, but only because Xavier's in the other room." _'And because that other beer in the fridge is just calling your name, ain't it dog-boy' _I contained my wild inner laughter, hiding it ceremoniously behind my usual mask of indifference. Somehow I didn't think he would appreciate me laughing at him...

Logan gave me one last glare before exiting the beautiful mahogany heaven..er..library. After I was sure he was gone I burst out into wild, rambunctious laughter. And, of course, his great shaggy head poked back through the large door. I stopped laughing immediately and put up my emotionless front. He growled out, "What's so funny, Snowball?"

"Your face." I replied simply. Man this was fun, stupid, and deadly, all at the same time! Logan's eyes narrowed even more, which I never thought possible. "What..did..you.. say..?" He managed to grind out through his anger. I just laughed. "I'm just messing with you sir. I was just laughing at something I noticed about the library." "That so? What was it." I giggled slightly. "I noticed there were porno magz. right next to the religious books." Logan stared at me like I had grown another head. "You're kidding...right?" I shook my head. "Nope. There's a nice stack of Playboy right next to an Amish rule book."

Even after Logan removed all the _fabulous_ male magazines from the premises, or to his room, I continued laughing. The look on his face was priceless! Looks at readers. What? I may look innocent, but that doesn't mean I can't think mean and/or sarcastic things!

I began browsing through the books, picking out things I wanted to read and organizing as I went; and believe you and me, this poor neglected library needed some serious organizing! I set the few fantasy books and mangas I found on a near empty table and decided it would be nice to clean this room up a bit. "You poor, heavenly library," I cooed softly, "has no one taken care of you and your precious contents? Everything's disorganized and ever so dusty! I hope none of your books have fallen into disrepair! Oh well, I can fix them, for I am...Serenity, the Book Doctor, at your service." I took a goofy pose and could pretty much imagine the American flag waving behind me.

I know, I know. I sound like a retard right? Well I can't help it! Books are wonderful things, portals to different worlds, and I just can't stand to see them like this! Dusty books put away on whatever shelf was on the previous readers way! How can that Xavier guy stand it?

I gave the room a once over with my eyes before figuring out where to start.

'_Beware Xavier mansion, I'm here... and I don't know when I'm leaving...MUAHAHAHAHAHAA! ...' Chokes on spit_


	3. Chapter 3: WTF!

**_Love isn't blind. It's Sarcastic!_**

**By LadyLoveless**

**And zukoslvr (Now mentallyinsanepyress)**

OKAY! Here's chapter three of LOVE! YAY! GO US! WH00T, WH00T! This chap is dedicated to the 6 people out of 656 that actually reviewed! (Sry MIP, Your review doesn't count!!) Especially to Kat-the reviewer who wouldn't put in her screen name; if she had one! TT sobs I luv you! But we're curious- What exactly is a mary sue? We have a general idea but quite frankly I don't see why people keep telling me my chars. are Mary-Sues! They aren't super perky, smart, nice, or whatever you people think is required of a mary sue! Bah Humbug! Lol! N e wayz this chap is for Kat- thanx for the hilarious review, you reminded us of ourselves! xD

PS: It's now 2-16-07. I finished this chapter like…2-3 months ago…. --' Sorry for the wait. I'm working on the 4th chapter as we squeak! I'll try to put it up tonight. promise!

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**Chapter Three- WTF!**

**Quote of the day- Romance, who loves to nod and sing,**

**With drowsy head and folded wing,**

**Among the leaves as they shake**

**Far down within some shadowy lake.**

**To me a painted paroquet (parakeet)**

**Hath been a most familiar bird-**

**Taught me my alphabet to say-**

**To lisp my very earliest word**

**While in the wild wood I did lie,**

**A child- with a most knowing eye. **

**Edgar Allen Poe, _'Romance'_ **

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**_Recap-_ **_'Beware Xavier mansion, I'm here... and I don't know when I'm leaving...MUHAHAHAHAA!!!..' Chokes on spit _

_**XXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXX**_

**Serenity POV **

I sighed happily. I was dusty, dirty, and hungry, but very happy. Why am I happy, you ask? Well I've almost completely cleaned and organized the library in only….3 hours!

I yawned slightly and rubbed at my dust filled eyes. "I seriously need a shower." I said as I stood up from reorganizing the last shelf of the library. I backed up to the door leading to the hallway to survey my work of the library, grinning with joy at what I saw. The room was organized and shining, me having polished the oak shelves, tables, and chairs. I had even vacuumed the small plush chairs in the corner of the room and the floor! I scanned over the shelves to make sure all the labels were in place, then over to one of the larger tables where I had stacked a massive pile of books to repair.

I huffed slightly when I looked at the books on the table, but brightened at the possibility of a fun project; if I wasn't forced to go home. The prospect of having to go back 'home' where the only books we're allowed to read are our school textbooks made me want to steal all these books, hide in a dark corner and read them until they fell apart.

**Normal POV **

Serenity cocked her head to the side slightly as she stared at the heap of books on the table before she ran over, picked one up and hugged it to her chest. She made a purring noise deep in her throat and stroked the spine of the book delicately with a slender index finger. "My precious…" she cooed, doing her best Gollum/Sméagol impression. Her eyes positively glowed as she looked down at the old leather bound book she held in her arms, not noticing her audience standing at the door with their mouths gaping.

Suddenly she heard snorts of laughter, then people falling over in fits. She whirled around to the look at the hallway door and her eyes widened. Standing in the hallway around the door was Kurt and his friends from earlier, all of them either leaning against the doorway or walls to support themselves. Her face turned beet red and she lowered her head, her bangs shadowing her face.

Kurt wiped his eyes and walked over to her, slinging his arm around her shoulders. "I'm sorry fräulein, but that vwas hilarious!" he said, laughing again. He calmed down after a second and all his friends pilled into the sparkling library. "Is this what you've been doing all day?" Scott asked the small girl. She clutched the book tighter to her chest and nodded before looking up at them shyly. Bobby walked over to her and bent down slightly, gently grabbing her face and studying it. Her eyes narrowed.

Bobby let out a low whistle. "You weren't kidding Kurt, she's gorgeous! How old are you kid? 12, 13?" Serenity glared harshly at him. "I'm not a kid, you haughty bigot! I'm 18, which is most probably older than you!" she snapped, shrugging Kurt's arm from her shoulder and setting the leather bound book back on the table. She turned back towards the group of gaping teens and sighed. "I know, I don't look it do I? What did you think I was, a sevvy?" she asked, hands on her hips.

Kurt laughed. "**Man sieht dir dein Alter nicht an!** Honestly, I thought you vwere an elementary student!" he scratched the back of his head. Serenity stared at them impassively. "Hn." She turned around again and crossed her arms, pouting. "Well, you were acting like a scared child when we met you." Scott scoffed. Serenity whirled around and gave him a dirty look. "How would you feel if you were sitting in class one second, asleep the next, then floating fifteen feet from the ground watching people you don't even know?" she shouted at him, waving her arms slightly. "Hell, I'm wearing the fucking dress from my dream! Man, I don't DO dresses!" she said in disgust.

She sighed again then blushed. "I'm sorry about that, I don't do well around other people. Fact of the matter is I haven't talked to anyone since last week when I started telling off my…principal." She trailed off, looking thoughtful. "Unless singing in choir counts." She added. She ran a hand through her hair. "I hate confrontations so I automatically start telling people off. Think of it as a shield to protect myself from other people before they hurt me."

Kurt cocked his head to the side then chuckled. "Zere's no need for zat here fräulein, no vwone here's going to try and hurt you. Vwe're all harmless." He said, then stopped. "Even if some people act like zey are…vwhat do you call it..PMSing?" A couple of the girls in the group let out cries of protest while Serenity twitched slightly. Kurt looked down and saw her twitching and shaking, her head bowed again. He put his arm around her shoulders again. **"Sweeting Sie gut?"** He asked worriedly.

All eyes in the room turned towards the girl again, thinking that they had offended her somehow and she was crying. Serenity lifted her head slowly, her shaking increasing. She suddenly threw her head back and laughed wildly! She doubled over, clutching her sides and leaned back against the table. **"OH- Götter! PMSing!" **she choked out. "Kurt…NEVER…say…that again! Too…CUTE!" she burst out laughing again and fell over. Kurt blushed somewhat then laughed along with her.

After her laughing fit, Serenity was almost too weak to stand back up. Kurt offered her his hand but she just waved it away. **"Sorgen Sie sich nicht Kurt, ich sind fein!"** she laughed, wiping tears from her eyes. She used the table to pull herself back up. She looked at the currently freaked out group of teens. "I'm sorry; it's been awhile since I've laughed that hard! That was great…" she trailed off, a smile tugging at her lips. Scott and the others chuckled. "I could get used to that cute laugh of yours Serenity," Bobby said impishly, "I just hope in the future it'll be ME making you laugh!" Evan smacked him upside the head while various others hit, slapped, kicked and punched the wanna-be smoothie bomb.

Kurt shook his head at his friend before remembering. "Oh ja! Fräulein, zese are all of my friends- and ze other residents of the school." He said, grinning at the now quiet girl. He turned and pointed them all out. "Zis is- Scott, Keety, Jean, Rouge, Bobby, Evan…." The introductions continued on for a minute before he finally got to Roberto. He took a deep breath then exhaled. "That vwas a long list of people to name off, ja?" he asked Scott, laughing slightly. Scott just grinned.

Bobby walked back over to Serenity and draped an arm over her shoulders like Kurt had. He gave her a charming grin. "So, are you hungry sweet thing?" he asked, leaning down and resting his cheek against hers. Serenity hissed then pulled a 'Miss Congeniality'. She stomped on his foot with her heeled shoe, elbowed him in the gut, whirled around and jabbed him in the eyes, then kicked him in the family jewels. Bobby let out a cry of agony and dropped to the floor.

"Oh god," he moaned, "not another Pyra!" Serenity cackled and crossed her arms. "Don't mess with me little boy!" she said almost evilly as the girl's laughed and the other boys in the room covered their prized area. Just then the infamous Remy LeBeau walked into the library. He took one look at the little girl in the white dress and strode quickly over to her. He came up behind her and scooped her up into his arms then set her onto his broad shoulder. She shrieked.

Remy grinned enchantingly up at her. "Nah who might this dahlin little creature be?" "Her name is Serenity.." Kurt started. "And I'm not a dam cockatiel! Put me down!" Remy let out a booming laugh. "Polly wanna crackah?" he asked impishly. Serenity cackled like a parrot. "Reah! **Polly möchten geld Sie!** reah!"

Kurt stared at her a moment before backing away slightly and laughing insanely. "**Jetzt ist der nicht sehr netter Fräulein!**" he choked out between fits of laughter as he shook his finger jokingly at her. Serenity just gave him a wicked grin. Remy looked back and forth from her to Kurt before asking, "Remy dun want ta know, does he?" Serenity looked down at him and let out a un-lady like snort. "Is that a rhetorical question?"

Remy smiled wryly. "Maybe, maybe not. How old ah ya kid? Ya new 'round here?" Serenity cracked up, "Are you fucking serious? I'm eighteen hun, believe it or not; and yeah, I'm new." She wiped tears from her eyes, chuckling slightly at the strange look of shock and amusement on his face. Remy shook his head. "Ya be rather underdeveloped, **Fauve.**" He teased. She raised a delicate brow. "That so? At least I don't be needing to improve on my grammar you dunce." She mocked. Remy tsked. "Now, now Chere, no need to be so hostile."

Professor Xavier rolled quietly into the crowded library. "Mr. LeBeau kindly put Ms. Bones down." Remy let out an exaggerated sigh of unhappiness and gently set her down. Serenity made a big show of dusting herself off, lightheartedly complaining of 'boy cooties'. "Awww…Now why'd Ah hafta go an' do dat? She was ratha warm…Ah was hopin' possibla in mo' ways den one," Remy said with a laugh, which earned a good backhand to his rock-hard 6-pack stomach, compliments of Serenity. To which she let out a loud yelp and waved her hand frantically.** "Dammit del dio!! Stupido figlio di un….. Ow che danneggia!! Bugger!!!"** she shrieked. Remy let out a light chuckle and asked, "Hurt yah'self? Ah probabla' don' wanna know what ya jus' said, do Ah?" Serenity just looked up and hissed at him, showing off a set of rather long fangs.

Xavier shook his head. "No, you don't want to know what she just said Mr. LeBeau. Miss Bones, kindly refrain from using such language in my mansion; even if it is in Italian." Serenity just let out a loud bark of laughter. "Why? It's not like I'll be here much longer! Either you'll send me away like everyone else does or they'll have tracked me down. Take your pick X." she stated with a sneer.

Xavier looked calmly into her eyes. "I won't send you away Serenity unless I deem you a danger to my students. For the moment I'll ignore that last part for fear of your temper. Now though, I would like to speak privately with you." He gave Kurt a knowing look. Serenity nodded curtly and swept into his office through the connecting door. Xavier rolled in after her and shut the door with his powers while Serenity wasn't paying attention.

Professor Xavier settled himself behind his desk while Serenity plopped into a chair across from him. She crossed her arms and gave him a pointed look. Xavier cleared his throat before settling back into his chair and steeping his fingers. "Serenity, how much do you know about your parents?" Serenity snorted, "What parents are you referring to; the assholes that stuck me in the mental hospital, or the ones that didn't want me?" "Your birth parents Serenity." She yawned. "Not much. All I know is I'm the bastard child of a mutant whore and a client of her's."

Professor leaned foreword a little, ready to offer his proposition. "What if I told you I knew where your real parents were and how to contact them?" "I'd say you'd waxed your head a little too much today. You got to lay off the buffing Professor!" Xavier chuckled slightly. "Yes well, the fact is I do know who and where they are. Would you like to know them, to meet them?" Serenity's eyes narrowed as she jumped from the chair and slammed her fists onto his desk. "Why would I? They obviously didn't want me! No one does! I don't want to deal with any more of those sneers I always receive from my so-called parents. Screw them; they didn't need me and I sure as hell don't need them!" she hissed angrily.

. Her green eyes flashed sadly, betraying the anger in her voice. She was about to continue when a knock sounded at the door. Logan poked his head through the door. "You wanted me Wheels?" he asked gruffly. At the Professor's nod he flung the door open and dragged his feet across the floor. Giggles erupted from the floor. Serenity looked down and scoffed as she plopped back into her chair. Two little kids were firmly attached to his legs, sitting on his feet. "Get.them.off.now." he ground out. Professor laughed as the two jumped up and ran squealing and laughing from the room. Logan shut the door before crossing the room and plopping into the seat next to Serenity.

"Well? What's going on?" he asked rudely. Professor leaned back in his wheelchair again. "Let me get to the point then. Serenity, Logan is your father." Silence followed his statement. Logan stared at him completely bewildered, while Serenity burst out laughing. "Serenity, he is your father." She mocked, imitating Darth Vader. "Good one Prof, but seriously, where are you going with this?" "Yeah, what the hell are you talking about wheels?" Logan asked, clutching the arms of his chair tightly. Professor raised an eyebrow. "I just told you what's going on. Logan, Serenity is your's and Myst's daughter; the daughter of a Valkyrie and a mutant."

Logan paled. "How'd you know about that?" he asked hoarsely. Serenity turned and glared at him, "Oh, so you knew about me then? So even though you knew about me you tossed me away like I was nothing?!" she shrieked. Logan looked at her oddly; a mix between love, anger, and astonishment. "No. I left before. I didn't know...If I had I wouldn't have…Shit!" He trailed off and rested his head in his hands. Serenity just stared at him. Logan looked back up at the Professor. "How'd you know about Myst and me?" he asked again. Professor looked at him sadly. "One time during our session's I came across a particular memory of her, nothing private I assure you."

"I'd forgotten about it until I saw Serenity today. She looks remarkably like her mother. Not so much like you I'm afraid." He said simply. "This is probably a shock I know, but we need to take action now. Serenity why don't you and your father go talk for while and we'll settle things tomorrow." He added, waving towards the door. "No one appears to be in the game room, you should talk there." They both nodded numbly and stood up, heading for the door. They left and Logan led the way to the Game Room.

He opened the door for her to enter and she walked into the sun lit room and headed for the pool table. She proceeded to set up the balls and grabbed a small pool stick off the wall. She lined up the white ball and shot, scattering the balls in different directions; two going into the pockets. She kept her eyes on the table, though she could feel Logan staring at her. "What?" she asked quietly. He said nothing but walked over to the table and grabbed a pool stick for himself and taking a turn; hitting in three balls. They played the game silently; just hitting the balls hard and bouncing them around the table. After a while they finished and Serenity set it up again.

"Tell me." He said quietly. She looked up at him sharply. "Tell you about what?" she grouched. "Everything. How is she…your mom?" Serenity hit the white ball hard, sending it flying across the room. "Hell if I know." She snarled. "She dumped me in an orphanage directly after I was born. They had to take me to a hospital because she'd refused to feed me." She muttered darkly. Logan stared openly at her. "That doesn't sound like the Myst I knew." "The Myst you knew is gone. She went insane. I met her once and I don't plan on meeting her again." "Why, what happened?" he asked.

She walked over to the ball and picked it up before tossing it onto the table. "I don't want to talk about it now." "Why not?" "BECAUSE I DON'T!" she wailed, eyes tearing slightly. "Why'd you leave? If you hadn't she wouldn't have ditched me! I wouldn't be alone!" she choked out. She gave a small yell of frustration and flung the pool stick out the open window before wiping her eyes furiously. Logan felt his throat tighten as an unusual mixture of guilt, sorrow, and regret washed over him at the sight of her small body shaking. Gods above she looked like her mother; small and frail looking, but truly strong. He shook his head slightly. "I had to leave. Some one was after me, he still is. I couldn't risk him getting Myst…your mother, and using her as bait to get to me. I couldn't put her through that. But kid, if I'd have known I got her pregnant I wouldn't have left." Serenity whirled around to pin him with a furious golden glare. "How nonchalantly you say that. You talk about me as though I'm yours but you don't really accept it, adult." She said scathingly.

He stared at her coldly. He couldn't let her know she'd hit a nerve. "Listen here, I may be an ass but I'm not some sniveling coward that wouldn't take responsibility for their lo…someone close." He ground out. Serenity stared at him oddly.

"You…..Loved her?"

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"**Man sieht dir dein Alter nicht an!- **You don't look your age!

"**Sweeting Sie gut?"** – Are you alright sweeting?

"**OH- Götter! PMSing!"- **Oh gods! PMSing!

"**Sorgen Sie sich nicht Kurt, ich sind fein!"-** Don't worry Kurt, I'm fine!

****

**"Polly möchten geld Sie!"- **Polly want to geld you!

"**Jetzt ist der nicht sehr netter Fräulein!**"- Now, that's not very nice Fraulein!

****

**"Fauve-" **wild and uninhibited/unrestrained and outgoing--French

"**Dammit del dio!! Stupido figlio di un faggot! Ow che danneggia!! Fucker!!!"- **(Italian)-God dammit!! Stupid son of a….! Ow that hurts!! Bugger!!!

****

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Teehehee…Evil cliff hanger of dooom! Heh…hope the next chapter doesn't confuse you too much :P


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